Do you know what am i feeling right now?
Do you really know `what i mean` ?
Do you know what I really am?
If you do. So why you did it?

Do you know i hate being scolded with no reason?

Ah seriously it's really disturbing. DO YOU KNOW WHAT DOES IT FEEL WHEN YOU KNOW YOU DO NOTHING BUT YOU'RE BEING SCOLDED? YOU KNOW? I hate it.
I never want to make you feel angry, or sad, or what. But you scolded me, told me clearly that I'm that useless so you're angry and scolding me. Do you know what does `useless`feel?
ah, that time you'll feel that you're nothing in this world. Only make some noise or throw some trashes and disturbing the others.Yeah i'm such an easy sensitive-person.

Can you feel that hurts? ah?
I'm this hurt because of.. you.
Like i did something big or i've troubled you so damn muchh that you HAVE to do this.

Have i told you that i'm such a.. Poker face girl.
yeah maybe you can think like, I'm an angel outside but devil inside.
or I'm smiling outside but crying inside.
I'm happy outside but sad inside.
and you know? I'm so damn proud of it then.
I did my best if you want to know. It's okay when i did something wrong then you scolded me that hard. But now? I even don't know what i've done to you until you did it. It's hurting. Damn hurting much. And I don' think i'm okay right now. not at all.

Maybe you don't know about this or whatsoever. But I don't want to lie. It's okay i'm just telling to myself. It's okay and okay, okay again. I never asked you that you MUST hear my voice, no i never. I can't tell this with my own mouth so I just can type, telling with my disgusting self or what. I just feel that i'm hurt.
Thinking that i'm that USELESS that can't do anything better.


I'm sick. So sick. This's hard that i can't tell you truthfully. You can call me `coward` or laugh at me. that's okay.