Friday, March 4, 2011
#132 tired? I'm not?
from the very deepest bottom of my heart I finally want to tell you that I'm tired.How can't I? Everytime I try do my best to make you satisfied with all you want me to reach and I even must leave my dream to respect you first. You don't even see me cry, you don't even see me try to forget everything and you don't even know I ever think to leave because I think you haven't respected me for everything I've done for you.and for something I've left because you said I'm not allowed to do this, to to that, blablablabla; when I get something sucks you don't even care. You just talk about what thing I've just left; classic problem, my big dream that I finally decided to leave just because you command me and I fuckinly still respect you though I don't think you respect me back----------I'm just nothing, no?
I always try to think positively from what thing I've been through and make you happy. But somehow don't you think I'm tired? I cry alone, I smile alone, I mad alone, all alone, I'm so lonely. Not because I don't want to tell you but you don't even care. And when you said you're tired, I know, but don't you think I'm too? At least I still give you big respect on how I'm doing this all, sacrifice for you; and you don't think I'm tired? to be honest, I AM EXTREMELY TIRED. of what? everything. Not because I hate you but just I'm thirsty for everyone who has big spirits and supports on their shoulders to reach their dream and be happy, not just saying yes yes yes nod nod nod and doing for nothing, get it?
once again, not because I hate you, but for some reasons, I don't think this year I'll be 17. Just....because.
Labels: rants
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